Imagine hemorrhaging for 9 months straight so terribly that you couldn’t walk anywhere without leaving a trail, having several doctors just offer birth control and tell you that you’re too fat for a hysterectomy… It’s graphic but it is just one of the things I went through on my medical self-advocacy journey. These types of experiences create medical trauma triggers on top of people’s pre-existing triggers.
Many people with neurodivergent brains, trauma, and/or complex health issues fatigue trying to connect with providers. Their triggers impact interactions regarding their health thus creating barriers. We can be prickly and abrasive with our trauma being right there, ready to protect us from harm in a dysregulated, misunderstood way.
Likewise, doctors and nurses also struggle with how to engage with patients like myself. Unintentionally, exhaustion and biases are created which compound the frustrations of working with the chronically ill. Repeatedly being unable to successfully manage a client’s medical concerns is discouraging. Many have to deal with our dysregulation before they even have a chance to help us in the office.
So with all these stressful patient trauma responses, can you exclusively blame providers for responding in painful ways – especially when they have a system that restricts much of what they can do? Reminding myself of that, I’ve had candid conversations with nearly all my providers. I gleaned knowledge of what they need from me and other patients so they have the opportunity to meet medical needs in ways that help heal us instead of traumatizing us.
I now have several chronic and some rare diagnoses. I also have built an amazing medical support system of empathetic and knowledgeable providers that I am excited to see. The best part is some of them are even happy to see me instead of dreading my name popping up on their appointments for the day! You can have this, too.
Follow me on Tik Tok & Instagram for your busy days and find more detailed info here to help improve your medical care whether you are a provider or patient. Together we can learn from each other, navigate the current system, and advocate not just for ourselves but for changes in our local medical systems and beyond.
Wisconsinite Yooper 